A Candid Look at Marriage by Angry Jane
We realize not all marriage sucks. But most marriages do end in divorce for a reason. We have no worthy teachers on relationships with others. We usually don’t know our own heart. Most marriage is simply following passionate desire. We have no idea who we really are and until we know ourselves we sure as hell cannot know others. Men can be very dark & evil, selfish, and brutal at times. Especially when they fear losing their sex blanket security.
Married three times and divorced three time. Finally after learning who I am and ow I am I have engaged in a successful relationship with a man. We are unmarried over 17 years. We don’t fight.
Having sex with a husband has several purposes for the wife who eventually will grow weary of it. Passion will fade, desires will flee. Suddenly he doesn’t smell or look so good. Suddenly his ways of carnal endeavor become stinky, sweaty and painful at best. And if the woman doesn’t know how to quell resentments toward him…her skin may crawl when succumbing to her partner’s painstaking sexual needs.
Can the woman admit that sex is a burden? Or does she need to make certain that the man is in his place. Keeping him attentive by her sexual draw. Fear of a partner leaving is one of the top three most common fears.
Sex, Society, Security the three topics of fear. Loss of home, car, job=security. Loss of a partner who they have become dependent on emotionally for feelings of self worth and attachments to security=Sex. And finally “Society” how do I look to my piers, friends, family, people at work, loved ones etc. Losing pride of society by looking inferior or bad to others is the third most common fear. It’s good to address fear. Write it down. Put it in a God Box and ask your Higher Power to removed it.
Marriage can be one of the worst forms of bondage which few women are permitted to look at. Instead she goes into denial and finds a way to divorce the somewhat vulturous taskmaster. And so the blame game begins in a world which equate divorce to “failure”.
Don’t look at it like that. Divorce can be a reason to find yourself. Label it SUCCESS, accomplishment, lesson learned.
What? Does the woman owe him her body? SCREW MARRIAGE! Marriage is bondage. In my experience and horrible taste in men in youth, most men simply take hostages. They use their strength as a threatening tool of control.
Often the root of the relationship is piped through manipulation, blame, a lack of candor, and a pack of lies. And the cake iced with disappointment.
We should be free to sleep with whomever we are drawn to. Using wisdom and a keen sense of self worth to get to know the person for at least nine months time before committing to handing our body to someone
Woman have long used sex as a tool to get what they want. For instance “if you don’t buy me a dress I will be hurt and angry” infers the wife. And sex is then strictly off the table.
Marriage becomes the slippery den of thieves with a brood of vipers at its taxing vow of devotion.
And the money for the marriage license claims to give the owner sinless sexual bliss and enjoyment. Whose fucking idea was that? As if God Almighty requires that we pay the tax man so we are saved from the sin of “fornication”? Furthermore “pay the man” and have a clean slate regarding our sex records in the Lambs Book of Life.
Double bullshit! The entire commercialized view of marriage with its name exchanges is set up to fail. Why? Why do MOST marriages end in divorce? Because the minute you take that vow and pay that price to the beast the realization that your STUCK FOR LIFE begins to sink in. Are you kidding me? Oh you’ll get it someday.
What about children and the dream of the happy family scenario? What about the man’s right to make little copies of himself?
Well start by leaving the tax man out of the whole deal. Unless your in it for the money and you marry for money. Then pay the tax man.
But if your in it for Love with a man who is pretty much as penniless as you are. Two people who are slaves to the system to work a job they may or may not despise for the rest of their lives. With no retirement benefits or paid vacations….then do yourself a favor. Don’t set yourself up to have to go through a sticky financial divorce. God Almighty sanctifies any bed that is entered by Love. (we believe)
How to dispel resentments toward Loved ones. Simple and earnestly pray for them at the onset of anger and resentment. Keep praying for them daily until the resentment is gone. This is the 12 step method and it works.
One must work the steps 12 to recognize dysfunctional behavior patterns. Listing all character defects to start praying for solutions. Starting with taming the tongue.
Solutions to resentment and bickering. Never project bad feelings onto our partner. We must learn by the 12 steps how to process our feelings because no one else can fix us. (except God)
Blame must leave the room.
Insecurities must be dealt with lest we project fear of loss onto our partner.
Without God’s help the 12 steps won’t work. A sincere step three must be engaged.
It takes two to tango. Accusations and attacks must stop. All sarcasm must cease. Say what your mean and mean what you say.
Love means showing respect. This is vital in any relationship. Lies destroy trust. Lies must cease.